| #1 mick[143125] |
| 1Cust124.tnt12.bne1.da.uu.net |
| 0th |
| #2 Razoriel[143127] |
| nowra1-atm.nsw-remote.bigpond.net.au |
| 1st :D |
| #3 Mr.Puddles[143128] |
| 216.49.243-DSL-187.ckt.net |
| Wow. I was actually hoping for tons of spam on how you owned a living legend, and this is all i get? You should be ashamed of yourself. Though, I see that you actually tried when making this report. Better than some. Worst than most. Its missing..... a background. And its short. And the pictures where small. I wish you luck on your future reports. |
| #4 GeneralPatton[143129] |
| cache-mtc-am04.proxy.aol.com |
eh...alright. Small pics, no background, short game, what Mr.Puddles said. I suggest reading the report guides. Good luck on future reports and what not.
4 |
| #5 Your Fellow[143130] |
| ip142166118071.nbtel.net |
"The dragoon and one of the zealots is slaughtered"
The above sentence should read "The dragoon and one of the zealots ARE slaughtered". But it didn't. What I'm trying to say is...try to observe correct grammatical form in the future.
"JimTheGreen quickly replaces them at 6 o'clock, also adding a factory and machine shop"
The ABOVE sentence resembles a violin which suddenly strikes a horrendous, piercing wrong note. Ever hear of parallel structure? Parallel structure is the use of identical grammatical forms in a list or sentence. For example, instead of saying "also adding a factory and machine shop" you should instead say "also adding a factory and a machine shop".
|
| #6 Your Fellow[143131] |
| ip142166118071.nbtel.net |
(continued)
Besides those particular errors that I managed to pick up, here is some more constructive criticism. The report was rather short, and although it did contain humor which was at times amusing, it became rather repetitive near the end. Also, tactics were employed during the game that I recognized as rather..."newbish" for lack of a better word.
My remedy:
-Proof-read
-Report on a longer game
-Be creative when creating humor (The key to creativity is hiding your sources. --Albert Einstein)
-Become better at Starcraft using such means as 1v1ing skilled players and watching replays of skilled players OR report on games where two skilled people are playing
Please don't take any of the above advice personally, I am offering it constructively for you to adhere to or discard at will. I see potential in you as a reporter, and hope to see more reports from you in the future, each bearing a marked improvement from its precedor. Good luck.
Bye,
Me
|
| #7 Your Fellow[143132] |
| ip142166118071.nbtel.net |
| Don't you just hate the god damned content limit? |
| #8 Convider[143134] |
| Toronto-HSE-ppp3660508.sympatico.ca |
if you just skipped to the comment section, ill sum up the game for you.
The toss guy massed zeals,goons, and ran him over
he escaped by running his buildings away
the toss guy found and killed him
GG
5 |
| #9 Jakobderludner[143136] |
| 24-205-51-132.gln-eres.charterpipeline.net |
| I like this, however, it was too short and lacked much interesting stuff (much like my first report ^^) I suggest you either a) get better and play better players or b) find better players you can watch and report (sadly, I haven't succeeded in this u.u;;) |
| #10 LurkerBurger7[143140] |
| ool-182e1a3b.dyn.optonline.net |
| uhhhhhhhh no. |
| #11 livingexception[143142] |
| pcp03797940pcs.wilmsc01.tn.comcast.net |
Your Fellow, did you happen to read BlueRibbon's last report? Just curious as to what you would say about that one.
le |
| #12 sabotage[143143] |
| pool-68-161-122-19.ny325.east.verizon.net |
| lol nice for a first report! 3.5 |
| #13 ZeaL[143148] |
| cache-da01.proxy.aol.com |
| aGGH, not reports of newb games again |
| #14 Smeagol[143149] |
| dorset-ext.nt.tas.gov.au |
damn guys be a little bit more suportive at least this guy knows how to take pics!
u really should try and get a replay or observe a game with decent players and report on that as u obvisously know the basics of reporting and u could probably get gold if u listen to what your fellow has said about grammar and the wording of ur sentances.
gl and dont do a half arsed one next time ^_^ |
| #15 el_sux0r[143150] |
| 0-1pool26-204.nas32.philadelphia1.pa.us.da.qwest.net |
I'd like to suggest that if you pay attention to one minor detail, you'll go far.
Never, ever praise "dark templar power." Particularly not if you're on the recieving end.
Sadly, Convider sums up the game fairly well, but I'm not about to criticize anyone for reporting one-sided games. ;) |
| #16 Minatour[143151] |
| kenn-dial-1-110.amerion.net |
tototototo (''(°,.,º)/'') grrr....wat o ya nice report
grrgrr
|
| #17 Drunken)Gooser[143153] |
| dsc01-dav-oh-5-49.rasserver.net |
| I like it just because it's short. |
| #18 MrPimp[143155] |
| h00062573d35a.ne.client2.attbi.com |
this is horrible
|
#19  [143156] |
| 12-222-57-81.client.insightBB.com |
I like bw reports, but not this one.
4 |
#20  [143157] |
| 246-235.netfront.net |
don't want to be mean but this is a newbie reports about newbies
gawd this is like playing SC with my toes and writing the report with my ass. |
| #21 Minatour[143158] |
| kenn-dial-1-186.amerion.net |
| "luaghluagh"...... .. . . . . . .?LCoEICKEG(DC8$#IJ)* i lice fooode wacet dicoe uc likcede? |
| #22 [143160] |
| ip68-13-24-2.om.om.cox.net |
shitty replay, terrible report, terrible gramatic structure
2 |
| #23 Newbius_Maximus[143161] |
| CPE00508baa1831-CM400049820827.cpe.net.cable.rogers.com |
Okay...
The main complaint(s) for me are that:
1. The report is too short
2. The game is too crappy
3. The humor is crappy
4. the pictures are too small and bit too few
5. grammar is bad
I suggest that you pick a better game to report. If you can't play an exciting game yourself, you should probably go to some replay archives and report one of the good ones. Also, add in more pictures (meaningful mind you: they should show the core of the action, not some random insignificant battles), and make sure they are a bit larger. Thirdly, you should add in a background of some sort (even just black would help =/ ). Fourthly, if you can't crack any good jokes, don't crack them at all (it's better to write a report with no humor then to write one with crappy jokes), and lastly, I mentioned this to The-Nut, but you should spell/grammar check everything. Just copy and paste your report to microsoft word or something, then repaste it back
overall, good try 5/10 |
| #24 MInatour[143209] |
| kenn-dial-1-64.amerion.net |
haa i like the-nuts are good honey rosted haa fafc well gl with others
|
| #25 Your Fellow[143266] |
| wiley-181-20382.roadrunner.nf.net |
LivingException, I did in fact read BlueRibbon's report and will, at your request, do a review for it as well. I will post it in it's comment section as well as this one.
Bye,
Me |
| #26 Your Fellow[143270] |
| wiley-181-20382.roadrunner.nf.net |
By request of LivingException, here is a review of BlueRibbon's latest report. Having read LE's comments on this report, I assume he is looking for back-up for his criticism regarding grammar. I also believe he thinks me to be something of a teacher.
From the beginning of this report, I was able to appreciate a distinct personal twist, a style which tastefully came directly from BlueRibbon's personality. He has a very unique sense of humor which, while at times crude, had me laughing fit to burst (that's a lie, I never laugh out loud while reading things on the net, but nevertheless I found it extremely funny).
Yes, the report was a little detached and hard to follow. Yes, there were abundant grammatical errors. And yes, commas were placed randomly and horrendously. Due to technology, the grammatical trouble can be remedied with a nice spellcheck (I recommend Microsoft Word), and the detached inconsistencies can be fixed with practice. Same with the commas.
|
| #27 Your Fellow[143271] |
| wiley-181-20382.roadrunner.nf.net |
(continued, due to the ever-aggravating character limit)
Overall, the report was engaging, the game balanced and the girl hot. This is what is important in a report, and what I look for in enjoying them (well, excluding the girl. maybe.). The eight it was given may be a little generous, however I dont dispute the Gold rating one bit. Congratulations on a report well done.
Hope this satisfies, LE
Bye,
Me |
| #28 the-nut[143273] |
| ool-182e1a3b.dyn.optonline.net |
| DREFSAB! |
| #29 Triped[143404] |
| cf2.utc.com |
| 27: Don't try to sound so pompous if you can't follow the basic rules of English. |
| #30 Your Fellow[143465] |
| wiley-181-20382.roadrunner.nf.net |
| 30: What? |
| #31 Triped[143501] |
| cf2.utc.com |
| 30: Don't ask stupid questions either. |
| #32 32[143626] |
| warp142163179128.newtel.com |
| 32: Try to get the post numbers right. I know it must be hard. |
| #33 Triped[143643] |
| 0-1pool108-39.nas30.oakbrook1.il.us.da.qwest.net |
| who cares |
#34  [144137] |
| Toronto-ppp272638.sympatico.ca |
| 4, agree with comment 24 |
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