"In Worms: The Mystery Unfolds"

        I'm an idiot. Seriously. I just spent the last 30 minutes thinking I was watching little pink worms battle eachother, and they had little micro-jetpacks, some had laser sighted shotguns, some layed mines, and some we're dumber than me! You believe me? Your a fool! But fine, I got a few pix of the little worms, kinda gross if you ask me. Then again, you didn't ask me. Noone ever asks me. Maybe I shouldn't have gotten out of my box down on 33rd street this morning....

        The Goonz On Crackz we're the first to get a chance to go,  Total Loser was the name of the worm they sent out. He was a disgusting little thing. He ninja-roped his way out of a little branch he was stuck on, and then flew to the top of a tree that was hanging out on top of the terrain. Suddenly a little thing in the corner of my vision started beeping, and counted down from 10, Total Loser quickly applied the laser sights to his shotgun, and aimed at a worm that was close to water, named Mulligan. He succeded in getting 25 hitpoints off of the worm, and on his second shot, made with "1" remaining on the timer, he shot a worm named Crabbapple. He did 40 points of damage. The Crabapple worm looked rather pissed. He pulled out his shotgun, and tried to have bullets "rape" Honey The Cat, who was hanging on a tree branch just out of reach of the shotgun. He did no damage.

        Uzi Uzer, who hadn't been seen very much lately, came out of his reclusive lifestyle, and pulled out, a big wooden bat! He walked over to Shrapnel, who happened to be on the same bridge as him, and immediately smacked him over the head with the big heavy bat!

        As you can see here, a worm I think I actually talked to after the match. Not sure though, It may have been someone else. Anyway, Weeble, who is pretty innocent in the so called "war" up to this point, decides to avenger the death of Shrapnel, by placing a big ol' stick of dynamite right next to Uzi Uzer. Uzi was knocked into the water, and his watery grave, which I found later, was right next to Shrapnel! Talk about coincidence! Weeble was rewarded with a weapon crate, which he picked up on this turn. Unfortunately, I don't believe he ever used it.

        On there next move, the Goonz On Crackz selected the "Poopie Head" worm. You can guess that he's not loved by his fellow worms. That explains why he was so slow to reacting to the mine he accidentaly set of, which put him back down where he was to begin with, short 23 hit points. The Freaky-Moron's showed me then, how exactly they must've gotten the nick name freaky morons. One of the worms that had been fighting since the begining of this very heated battle, shot at the grass growing in the middle of nowhere! He spent both shots on that little piece of terrain, hurting no worm, and killing no worm! How about that?

        The more refined intelligence of Goonz On Crackz, even though there name doesn't suggest it either, pulled off a rather, stupid stunt. They killed the Crabapple worm, the one that was doing the stupid stuff, with a stick of dynamite.

        Something that cracked me up: The next turn by Freaky Moron didn't go as expected. Mulligan threw a grenade, obviously intending for it to hit Honey The Cat, instead of actually hitting Honey The Cat, it richoceted off of a little ledge over Mulligan, and bounched next to a mine. The grenade exploded and sent the mine up against the tree it was laying next to, and bounched next to Honey The Cat, where it immediately exploded! That is, assuming that I actually saw these guys. Honey probabally would've lost her life if the grenade had hit her, because the impact would have sent her into the water.

        Mark4- Super freak worm, and guns expert, equiped himself with a jetpack, and flew to pick up a few items, such as a utility crate which was on the other side of a wall, right next to him, he picked up an invisibility pack, unfortunately he didn't have time to use it if he planed to do some damage in this turn! He flew back over the wall, but accidentaly fell a bit, and had only 6 seconds to respond! He quickly pulled out his shotgun and aimed at the worm nearest to him. after that, he moved a worm downward, and left it next to the other worm. (names disclosed by parental request...I think)

        The worm Kyle was next. He picked up his slimy worm self, and slithered up a small hill, where he could take at aim at, you guessed it, Mark4! Since mark4 was un-characteristacally sitting next to a gas barrel about 2 inches above water, he was just asking to be bazooked. Infact, a weak exploding SKUNK could kill him with no problem. Kyle shot a bazooka at him. Gas barrel exploded. Mark4 drowned. Haha. No! Wait! No! Please have a momment of silence for Mark4

       Back to the little wormy battle. Butt-ie call strapped a jetpack to his wormy back, and flew up towards a waiting utility crate. He was fortunate enough to find was he was looking for, a 2x damage spell.

For those of you too ignorant.....err....busy and addicted to starcraft...to have played Worms:Armageddon, a 2x damage spell makes all your weapons do 2x the damage, for that turn.

        Butt-ie's choice of weapons was simple, a lowly airstrike, but each missle would do 2x damage. He airstriked near Mulligan, and another worm named "Hover" (AVOID THE VACUM) Mulligan was completely killed, but Hover was hardly scarred.       

  Next, the rather derated worm Kyle shot a grenade at Dr. wOrm, who at up to this point had been perfectly kind to all of the worms on the battlefield. Thank god he didn't die, all he did was lose 51 hitpoints, and fall down to the land right above the water.    

Dr. wOrm, who happened to be next in line for the Goonz On Crackz, wanted revenge on Kyle, and any other worm who happened to be standing near him. He loaded up on a Jetpack, and dropped a stick of dynamite next to him. Both he and Flusher died instantly in the blast. Let's all cheer for there deaths! YaY

        Next turn, Weeble used a shotgun of Dr. wOrm. He did it very quickly, and then shot the terrain behind him for no further explored reason.

        Butt-ie call hopped his way over to a nearby utility, which turned out to be a 2x spell. He decided that Weeble needed to be eliminated, he shot a homing missle at him, which was directly on target. Unfortunately, Weeble lived, with 7 hitpoints remaining. Weeble once again was chosen to go, but his attack, of a grenade, failed miserably, almsot knocking him into the water.

        Helmut, a new recruit I think, found himself next too 2 enemy worms, and 1 allied worm. I believe he made the right decision here, and let the other allied worm go, because there would only be 1 opposing worm remaining. He jetpacked up, and dropped a grenade on the pack of worms. One from each team died, but hover was knocked into a nearby cave, safely, for the time being..........

Weeble again! This time an airstrike! He used the special airstrike on Butt-ie Call, who happened to be hanging out near a ledge. The exsplosion knocked him into the water, drowning him.

        The Goonz On Crackz we're at an extreme advantage.Total Loser dropped a mine in the cave where Hover was staying. Hover drowned in the water. Poor Hover. Dortunately all the Goonz On Crackz had to destroy now was Weeble. Weeble has been a pain in the ass this game Weeble must be killed as evily as wormly possible.

        Weeble, now the last Freaky-Moron worm, shot a bazooka shot at Honey The Cat and Total Loser. Weeble got lucky, Honey the cat was killed on impact, and Total Loser was drowned in the water after that.

        It's all up to helmut. Do or die. 1 chance. One worm vs One worm. If he failed this chance he would likely die. He jetpacked to a position where he could get a shot off at Weeble. Unfortunately, as he was flying, he missed his target, and had to go at it again, he didn't look at his fuel gauge. He fell down. And Down. And Down. And Down.Then he landed on a small island, which could easily be destroyed by Weeble with no problem.  Weeble calculated for hours...or so it seemed. He finally got it down right, and aimed just a little bit up. The bazooka went straight down ontop of Helmut, destroying the island he was on, and drowning him! The Freaky-Moron's had come back to win the battle aginst immense odds!

This just goes to show you how good these bastards are compared to me. I suck at everything =[ Especially BR writing even though they are fun =]

Lessons Learned by the foolish writer.

1. Don't sit down for 6 hours after school and write a BR on a game. It's too hard.

2. Worms : Armageddon is still more fun than Starcraft. I just don't know anyone that plays Worms =[

3. I'm sorry if this took forever to load, and I don't know if it was worth it.

4. I don't have the option to do a minimap battle GIF for these. YaY

This has been a

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