"Don't really get the game and this monitor is darker than my dog's ass (if you need to ask...) but I'd still give it a 9 on account of the high writing quality." -maareek
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| Number One Suck | | | Author: | | | IP: | huru27.wXXXX | | Date: | 03/19/00 04:03 | | Game Type: | Starcraft | | Labels: | none | | Report Rating: , # of Ratings: 5, Max: 10, Min: 7 Lifetime Rating for WilliamWC3: 9.0882 |      |
Warning: This report was
written by an unusually clever monkey. There are
large black stripes thrown in randomly to annoy
you. Furthermore half of the report is just a copy
of the ascii representation of a jpeg file and is
only intelligible to Koreans. If any of the
pictures actually load I will be amazed. In fact
you have probably already scrolled over 15 screens
just to read this bright pink text on a white and
yellow blinking background because my gratuitous
45 megabyte jpeg of the 25 million shades of gray
my computer is capable of making hasn't loaded
yet. This report which contains three 2 hour
animated gifs of various shades of paint drying
and a quick time movie of blackness will more
likely than not crash your entire internet service
provider. You could wait it out but you'll
probably die first. Consider yourself warned. Download
font here.

With
a title like that I'm not sure what needs
explaining. I'll cut straight to the chase.
Welcome to the 21st Invitational Number One Suck
Tournament, South East Regionals, Group 3. For
those of you unfamiliar with the Number One Suck
it is unlike traditional tournaments. In
traditional tournaments the winner advances to the
next round, but like a famous cool guy once said,
"Winning isn't everything, its just a good way to
get women." In memory of this famous cool guy,
every year contestants from around the world play
for something other than winning, namely
losing.
The rules of the Number One Suck
are simple. Four contestants enter each round
divided into two teams. The two teams play each
other in a 2v2. The two players of the losing team
then play each other and the loser goes on to the
next round. This continues until only one loser is
left or everyone just gets bored and goes home. Ok
the truth is I got banned from all the other
tournaments for repeatedly whispering the
starcraft commissioner that he and I were both
monkey boys and that there was no way out for us.
Oh well.
Well I've got
the gas grill started.. It all started in the
quaint little town of nohunters-ville where
everyone knows everybody's name, favorite
starcraft race, and sexual orientation. I was
hanging out in the channel, logged on through my
colorful topaz chat bot and occasionally making
non-sensical remarks. It was after one such remark
that HolyAnarchy noticed me and began whispering
me with the intention of having me battle report
one of his games. Evidently the word had not
spread about last week's Australian Open disaster
in which I had accidently banned both contestants
before the game started, stating that they were
"lagging like mofo's" and then proclaimed my
fellow observer king of the world. Perhaps now
would be a good chance to rebuild my
credibility.
While the people in the
channel debated endlessly over silly questions
like what type of game we were playing and who was
going to be in it, I went ahead and created on my
favorite map, Octopus. Six people joined my
prettly little game making me feel quite good
about myself. Some wanted to be observers. Some
wanted to play a massive free for all. Others were
just trying to talk to Peter's girlfriend. The
result was mayhem. I resisted the tempatation to
start the game before anyone could figure out what
was going on and then spam "WHO ON MY TEAM??" A
lenghty debate ensued finally ending in a vote
between a 1v1 or a ffa. Unfortunately half of the
people remained undecided so we just played a 2v2.
The teams ended up being HolyAnarchy and
TheRuberDucky vs Jamellan and Kinslayer(tm),
-Sexaholic- and I observed and all the people who
were just looking for the weather channel left the
game.

The
teammates of team Extra Suck have combined for a
total of 71,000 battle reports at good ole
battlereports.com, but what of their starcraft
skills? Will they be true to their name and show
us a little extra today?

I
don't know who Kinslayer is but Jamellan is the
author of several comical series including of
course Evil Eye Laser Man. Their super human suck
factor is undisputed but will it be enough to lose
to team Extra Suck?


The map
is layed out in a rather unique fashion with eight
interconnected mains on the high ground, seven
interconnected expansions in the south and seven
interconnected expansions in the north all on low
ground. There is also one lone island on each side
and four "islands" in the center. Basically the
map is super ridiculous and thus my reason for
choosing it.
Fun Fact:
The octopus' arms are covered in
little suction cups. Furthermore despite having
eight arms it is completely unable to juggle.
Thus, the octopus is the undisputed number one
suck of the animal
kingdom.
|  |

As the
game screen appears we find all of our contestants
on the eastern edge of the map with Kinslayer[SS] at 1:00, Ducky[ES] at 2:00, Jamellan[SS] at 4:00 and
Holy[ES] at 5:00. Sex
and I were both in the upper-left and we floated
our command centers to that corner. The other
players all chose to leave there starting building
in place and return minerals to it, a rather
popular strategy the details of which I won't get
into now. Soon scouting probes, scv's and drones
began wandering about the map looking for
opponents, expansions and free beer. Complaints
about the map began early and continued throughout
the rest of the game.
Kinslayer[SS] began with a
fairly standard 2 gate build with fairly early
cybernetics and assimilator to leave the tech
option open. His teammate, Jamellan[SS] meanwhile built
a single barracks, single factory and then began
teching in all directions at once, adding a
machine shop, academy and starport simultaneously.
Ducky[ES] the other
terran also went single rax but decided to go
early command center which he then floated to the
nearby side island expansion. After the command
center he added two factories with one machine
shop followed shortly by a starport. Holy[ES] forgot to cancel his
extractor but decided to build two extra
hatcheries in his main anyway. He sent a drone out
to take an expansion but it wandered around for
about a half hour without finding one. Ducky[ES] advised his
teammate to power hard and go for massive air.
Team SS kept quiet during this time.

Well
soon after Kinslayer[SS]'s cyber
finishes he tells his partner of his plans to go
shuttles / reavers. Realizing that he has three
zealots which will soon be obsolete he decides to
dispense them in the direction of Ducky[ES]'s base. These
zealots seem anything but obsolete to Ducky[ES] who at the moment
has nothing but three marines a couple of
factories and a floating command center. To stall
for time Ducky[ES] does
some intricate dances with his marines most of
which involve getting them killed and lifts off
half of his buildings. While proving totally
inefective at killing the zealots these maneuvers
do quite successfully delay the zealots in their
intended rampage of his base. Finally the first
vulture pops out of a factory and begins launching
grenades at the zealots. The zealots pull back
some but the speedy vulture gives chase and some
more blows are exchanged. Finally the zealots pull
all the way back to the ramp where they meet with
fresh reinforcements.
Jamellan[SS] has sent one
tank, an scv and four marines to join the now
lively party. Now the combined super suck forces
move into Ducky[ES]'s
base. Ducky[ES] has
managed to make some more troops while this was
going on and now has about six marines and three
vultures. Team super suck now has some sort of
communication failure as Jamellan[SS] sieges his tank
and holds back while Kinslayer[SS]'s three zealots
charge forward. The zealots manage to kill a few
marines but all three of them go up in blue flame.
Seeing this Jamellan[SS] unseiges his
tank and moves forward. The result is nearly a
draw but Ducky[ES]'s
vultures ultimately prevail.


No sooner
did Ducky[ES] hold off
this attack though, than he found himself the
victim of a one reaver, two zealot drop. Kinslayer[SS] dropped his
deadly cargo near the refinery behind Ducky[ES]'s defences. Almost
all of the scvs managed to make it to saftey and
the command center lifted off leaving the reaver
and zealot to attack supply depots and the
refinery. The zealots shortly wandered into some
bunkers and tanks and were fried but the reaver
managed to take out a bunker and a supply depot
from where it had been dropped. A siege tank was
soon moved in range and began blasting away at the
intruder. Kinslayer[SS]
was unable to pick up his reaver before it
exploded in a blue cloud of smoke under the
artillery fire, so he retreated with his enemy
shuttle having stopped mining and wreaked small
amounts of havoc in the enemy
base.
As soon
as the reaver threat at home was eliminated, Ducky[ES] sprang into action.
He sent four vultures back behind Kinslayer[SS]'s base, which
as a peculiarity of this map has a ledge within
vulture range of the supply line. Kinslayer[SS] is forced to
pull his supply line off of his minerals after
losing several of his precious probes. He
immediately sends four dragoons around to deal
with the bikers. After exploding the vultures the
dragoons stay behind the supply line which proves
convienent as three mutalisks from the til now
presumed dead, Holy[ES]
soon show up with the intention of harassing the
miners. Just as quickly the mutalisks leave and
Kinslayer[SS]'s base
becomes quiet once more.
While all
of this is going on each player takes the
oppurtunity to expand. Jamellan[SS] finishes a drop
ship and lands an scv in the southern expansion
just west of his main. Ducky[ES]'s command center
which he built ten minutes ago finally lands in
the western "island" expansion. Kinslayer[SS] drops a probe
into the northern expansion just south of his main
and begins warping in some trouble. Holy[ES] who sent a drone out
to expand some time last week finally manages to
get into the 7:00 main and starts morphing a
hatchery there.


Jamellan[SS] who was left out
of the action in the preceeding section loads up
two dropships full of fun and sends them in the
direction of the much harassed Ducky[ES]. Fortunately this
time Ducky[ES]'s base
won't have to take another beating as the
dropships are cut off by three of Holy[ES]'s mutalisks. The two
transports unload two tanks and eight mixed
m&m units on the side island just south of
Ducky[ES]'s main. The
marines chase off the mutalisks and what ensues is
a rather unusal battle between tanks in Ducky[ES]'s base and Jamellan[SS]'s assault force.
The tanks in Ducky[ES]'s base are up a
cliff from the opossing forces but they are down
in the sunken temple so they still have to fire up
and over a cliff's edge. The mutalisks and
dropships give sight for both sides. What this
means in terms of attack advantages is anyone's
guess. The battle is interrupted however when the
four mutalisks of Holy[ES]'s which had just
been chased off find Jamellan[SS]'s undefended
expansion and begin playing acid spore bowling
with his scvs.
We'll continue with the
game in a second but first a word from our
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|  | ...and
we're back.
Jamellan[SS] loads up the
assault force and brings them back to his
expansion to chase off the mutalisks before they
can kill all of his scvs. The medirine combined
with freshly researched irradiate manages to kill
off most of the mutalisks and drive away the
rest.
No sooner
is the first team super expansion secured however
than another flock of Holy[ES]'s muties finds Kinslayer[SS]'s expansion.
There are already three cannons in place and after
killing off one of these Holy[ES]'s mutalisks retreat.
As you might have noticed from the map most of the
expansions are easily tankable and Ducky[ES] immediately begins
to do just that. About ten marines, two tanks and
a small squadron of four wraiths set up camp on
the south-eastern cliff of the expansion and
commence firing. Kinslayer[SS] has made the
unfortunate decision to build two stargates at
this expansion and both of these are quickly
felled. This tanking continues throughout most of
the rest of the game finally taking out the nexus
about ten minutes later long after all the probes
have left.
At about
the same time this is happening another reaver
drop is being attempted by Kinslayer[SS] at Ducky[ES]'s base. This time a
couple of wraiths find the shuttle and exterminate
after it drops only one reaver. The reaver manages
to get off one scarab killing three marines before
it is taken down by wraiths. Following this
activity there is a short lull in which Ducky[ES] expands to a
northern expansion on the other side of the map
and Kinslayer[SS]
expands to a nothern base north-west of his
main.


The
temporary cease fire is interrupted when one of
Jamellan[SS]'s wraiths
flies directly across Ducky[ES]'s little encampment
outside of Kinslayer[SS]'s expansion and
explodes instantly. Holy[ES], who is watching his
teammates units more closely than his own notes
the wraith and warns Ducky[ES] creating still more
confusion amongst the members of team ES. on the
other side of the map another little drama is
unfolding as a scouting scv is chasing a drone off
on some unknown mission and is in turn being
chased by a mutalisk. There are also atleast two
probes and another scv off wandering around trying
to understand the map.
To make
up for the striking lack of action in the
preceding paragraph, Jamellan[SS] loads up six
marines and two medics and drops them off in Ducky[ES]'s first expansion
which is currently undefended. A squadron of about
six wraiths come in cloaked to deal with the
threat and manage to kill three marines who are
seperated from the medics before their cloak
starts to wear out. With the help of comsat Jamellan[SS]'s remaining
three marines kill the rest of the wraiths and
continue to wreak havoc in the base. The marines
then chase after some scvs the two medics next to
Ducky[ES]'s command
center where Ducky[ES]
begins to rebuild scvs. Eventually the marines
come back and finish off the command center
despite the efforts of a couple more cloaked
wraiths..
To try
and take some of the pressure off of Ducky[ES], Holy[ES] sends a flock of
about ten mutalisks to Jamellan[SS]'s supply line at
his main. Unfortunately for team ES Jamellan[SS]'s medirine and
science vessels are more than a match for the
muties and the muties return home which
incidentally is still an unknown location to team
Super. Back at Ducky[ES]'s expansion again,
Ducky[ES] now brings in
a dropship with two tanks along with another
couple wraiths and miraculously manages to lose
all of it to the three marines and two medics.
Holy[ES] continues to
harass Jamellan[SS]'s
supply line at his main by periodically sending in
flocks of mutalisks. These flocks are all either
deterred to destroyed by Jamellan[SS]'s marines and
science vessels. Holy[ES] also expands to the
southern expansion just south of Jamellan[SS]'s main. Now
seems as good a time as any to point out that
though Holy[ES]
expanded several times he built few drones at any
of his expansions primarily using them to mine gas
to fuel his large air army.
Intermission:

Everyone
take a breather. Enjoying the show so far? Good,
great, wonderful. Lets take stock of where
everyone is and where they are headed. Holy[ES] as you might have
noticed is going all mutalisks and is now in the
process of teching to guardians and devourers.
His teammate Ducky[ES] after a short
affair with vultures has been making mostly
tanks and wraiths with some marine support.
Jamellan[SS] has been
building marines and medics with dropships and
science vessel support and his now shifting into
heavy wraith mode. Kinslayer[SS] started off
going up the shuttle/reaver/observer branch of
the tech tree but has since made a couple
templars and has now reconstucted his stargates
at his northern expansion and made a couple
corsairs.
|  |
The
first thing that happened after the intermission..
which didn't actually happen, I just threw it in
because I was bored is Kinslayer[SS] attempts a drop
on Ducky[ES]'s newest
expansion in the western half of the map. The
shuttle explodes after several hits from a
defensive missile turret however, before its
contents are revealed. Ducky[ES] now in an attempt
to regain the expansion he lost to three marines
and two medics moves about seven tanks and twelve
marines to the cliff north of the expansion and
begins raining fire on the troops below. Jamellan[SS] who has for some
reason reinforced his original three marines and
two medics with more infantry sends in about a
half dozen wraiths to deal with this
push.

Jamellan[SS] having
successfully driven Ducky[ES] out of the
expansion north-west of his main now begins
setting up his own command center there. He also
sends two dropships full of m&m and a squad of
wraiths at Holy[ES]'s
7:00 expand. The expansion which is vitually
undefended and only had about 5 drones at it
anyway falls. Holy[ES]
however has now built three more hatcheries all at
southern expansions bringing his total number of
bases to 5 and his current number of mining drones
to 4. His teammate Ducky[ES] is also in an
expanding mode taking a northern expansion on each
side of the map. Kinslayer[SS] not to be left
out of the expansion race takes the northern
expansion south-west of his main.

As soon
as Jamellan[SS] is
finished mopping up Holy[ES]'s 7:00 expand he
sends his large wraith force and a couple of
science vessels at the recently morphed
infestation just south of his main. As fate would
have it Holy[ES] has
about a dozen mutalisks, four devourers and a few
guardians at this expansion. Jamellan[SS] uses his science
vessel to irradiate one of the mutalisks. All of
the mutalisks and a few scourge charge after it. A
combination of air to air missile fire from
invisible fighters and the radiation manages to
kill off all of the muties quickly. The twelve or
so wraiths then charge in and take out the slow
firing devourers easily. The guardians make a
suicide run into Jamellan[SS]'s base to little
effect. The expansion falls.
Ducky[ES] realizing that his
partner is not going to be tons of help decides to
try and curtail team Super's expansion. He seiges
up a couple of tanks overlooking Kinslayer[SS]'s newest
expansion in easy firing range of the supply line.
Also as a result of pure luck a small group of
cloaked wratihs on a routine reconnaissance
mission end up wreaking havoc in the expansion
Jamellan[SS] recently
won from him.

You may
have noticed that Kinslayer[SS] has been
awfully quiety for the last, oh seven paragraphs.
Well in the WilliamWC3 book of starcraft (on sale
in a store near you) when you are playing against
protoss, no news is definitely bad news. Well as
it turns out Kinslayer[SS] has not been
idly mind controlling kakarus and getting them to
fly formations over his base. Instead he has been
forming an air fleet of an entirely different
kind. Three carriers, four corsairs, two observers
and an arbiter leave Kinslayer[SS]'s air space at
his most sout-western expansion which has recently
fallen under tank fire. Two exploding tanks were
Ducky[ES]'s first
warning of the incoming doom fleet. The carriers
continued onward into Ducky[ES]'s expansion which
was his only currently operational base. Ducky[ES] pulled the wraiths
which were in the process of destroying Jamellan[SS]'s expansion
back, but almost all of them were stasis fielded
as soon as they approached the fleet. The rest
died quickly to the corsairs. Dwebs were laid down
and the carriers did the rest. The base
fell.
Well as soon
as Jamellan[SS]
restored order in his expansion which had recently
been ransacked by cloaked wraiths, he renewed his
offensive against Holy[ES]. With science vessel
and wraith support he brought two dropships full
of medics and marines and dropped them in Holy[ES]'s main. Holy[ES]'s defense for some
peculiar reason consisted primarily of devourers
which mostly just flew around and fretted while
the m&m ripped through the base. Holy[ES] warps in a few
guardians out of his ass and with the help of a
few scrambled hydralisks they are able to take out
the medirine at heavy cost. Jamellan[SS] sends the
science vessels in though and after irradiating
Holy[ES]'s last
guardian drops three more ships full of m&m.
Holy[ES] scrambles
about twelve more hydralisks but they die to the
massive medarine army in much the same way small
fishing crafts would die to a fleet of modern
warships (really really badly).
After
these two major team Super offensives, Holy[ES] has been reduced to
three developing expansions and his teammate Ducky[ES] to two developing
expansions and his main. Kinslayer[SS]'s fleet now
continues southward to Holy[ES]'s western most
expansion where it meets little resistance. Next
the fleet turns back nothwards and easily takes
out Ducky[ES]'s western
most expansion. To top it all off two reavers are
dropped at Holy[ES]'s
northern most expansion in the center of the map.
At this point in time, not having a solution for
either Jamellan[SS]
m&m or Holy[ES]'s
doom fleet, tired, confused and wanting to go home
to the lost temple, team Extra Suck concedes the
game showing once and for all and that they
certainly do suck.



Well
thats all very well and good but as my personal
hero Evil Eye Laser Man once said right before he
killed off his ill-fated alter-ego, Evil Eye Ninja
Man, "There can be only one [number one suck]."
Besides as ducky said, what would a wc3 br be with
only one game.. besides only a minor pain in the
ass to download. Anyway Jamellan and Kinslayer
went off to celebrate the fact that they don't
suck as much as everyone thought they did while
Ducky and Holy prepared to face off. I was about
to recreate on octopus when Holy said he'd make. I
joined the game to find out it was on Rivalry.
Damnit.

Official Suck Map:
Rivalry,
also known as that other four player, jungle
tile, 128 x 128 starcraft ladder map, is the
site of three of my roomates losses in WC3
reports. Furthermore it is also the map people
who only like to play on temple play on when
they aren't playing on temple. For these
reasons, and the fact that I hate it, I declare
Rivalry official number one suck starcraft
ladder
map.
|  |
Orange and
brown.. great. Is it too late to change my
background scheme.. If only it was Holoween. Snap
out of it, William. Ok this br is already
ridiculously long so I'm going to try and hurry it
up a bit so I can sneak in under the 64K limit.
I'm not going to color code names any more so just
remember Holy = brown = terran and Ducky = orange
= zerg. While the contestants try to figure out
what race each other are I watch the build orders
develop. Holy begins with a depot at his choke and
then throws up a pair of barracks. Ducky forgets
to cancel his extractor and whispers to me
indicating that he is going for mutalisks.
Hmmm.... The first bit of excitement occurs when
Ducky's overlord is cleverly caught by a couple of
Holy's marines and Ducky concedes the game clearly
unable to compete with such
cleverness.

While Ducky
is teching to mutalisk he also takes to the time
to morph a hatchery in the north-east main for
increased resource gathering. Holy meanwhile
builds a command center in his base and begins to
float it over to the south-east main at about the
same time. While the command center is still in
the air though Holy decides to test Ducky's
defenses at his main. He sends about eight marines
and two medics to check out the ramp. He finds
four zerglings which are fried quickly and a
sunken just up the ramp. Ducky frantically begins
to morph two more sunkens along the edge of his
cliff guarding the ramp. While Holy is hitting the
sunken about ten mutalisks show up and help end
the terran raiding party after the loss of the one
sunken.
Shortly after
the defeat of his medarine task force, Holy's
command center arrives at the south-east main only
to find a zergling waiting for it there. The
command center immediately reverses direction and
heads back to his main. Meanwhile, Ducky, having
secured his base sends his flock of about eight
mutalisk down to Holy's main where they come in
from the east and enter the supply line
unchallenged. A couple scvs explode before Holy's
marines can get back to chase off the mutas. As
the mutas are leaving the base they happen upon
Holy's command center which has just gotten back
from the far side of the map. The mutalisks
commense firing and they manage to blow it up just
before it reaches the saftey of Holy's
marines.
While this
is going on an scv finds the zerg expansion
begining in the north-east and manages to kill a
drone before being killed by a couple of muties.
Also Holy whispers me "offensive rax" which I take
to mean either he is going to do an offensive rax,
he is asking if he should do an offensive rax, he
did an offensive rax and I missed it because I was
hypnotized by the supply depots again, or he wants
me to do an offensive rax because he thinks I'm on
his team and that I just haven't been doing
anything yet. Whichever, I ignore the comment and
go back to counting doodads. At any rate Holy
continues to build m&m out of three
non-offensive barracks while teching to science
vessels. Ducky's mutalisks come back and pull the
same hit and run tactics again to about the same
effect.
Holy now
has a science vessel ready for action and he sends
it into ducky's base. He loses it to a bunch of
mutalisks but not before getting off an irradiate
which ends up killing four mutas. Holy also masses
some medarine forces outside of Ducky's main for
containment purposes and sends another group to
clean out ducky's north-east expansion. The
medarine trounces the non-existant defending
forces and manages to kill the hatchery and all of
the drones. Meanwhile, Ducky has built a hatchery
at the far eastern expansion. Holy attempts to
build a command center at the far-western expand
but a couple of mutalisks force him to cancel.
Ducky attempts yet another supply line raid but
this time marines are there waiting and a few
mutalisks go down before the rest
flee.


Back to
the medarine gathered outside of Holy's base, a
couple of tanks arrive on the scene and begin
pounding away at the sunkens up the cliff. Just as
the sunkens were exploding though three guardians
appear on the ledge and begin lobbing green shit
at the tanks. Holy's science vessel irradiates one
of them but the other two surrvive. Holy sends his
medarine which consists of about fifteen medics
and marines up the now undefended ramp. Before
they can get to the top though in a replay of the
scene in one of my earlier paragraphs twelve
mutalisks show up and with the help of the
guardians that just finished off the tanks,
obliterate the strung out medarine
forces.
Holy's
science vessel which is still near Ducky's base
goes in on a suicide mission and manages to
irradiate another mutalisk before getting
destroyed by Ducky's air fleet. In retaliation
Ducky sends his entire air force at Holy's main.
Unfortunately the mutalisks meet with a science
vessel going the other way and all of them die to
a single irradiate. Ouch! The guardians continue
on and are soon pounding away at Holy's
structures. Of the five guardians Holy is able to
irradiate two of them before running out of
energy. He lifts off his barracks but his medarine
is simply no help agains the flying beasts.
Finally another vessel gets 75 mana and irradiate
is cast. The medarine make one last charge and the
guardians fall though many brave soldiers died in
the battle.

No sooner did
Holy manage to hold of Ducky's guardians however
then a stream of zerglings started running up the
ramp. Having only a few marines left the zerglings
began ripping through everything. Holy lifted off
the rest of his bases but mutalisks and scourges
soon arrived to finish them off. Holy had just
finished a command center at the southern
expansion but that was soon found by still more
zerglings. A squad of medarine off on some mission
or another happened upon Ducky's recently morphed
northern expansion but the raping of it did little
to change the situation as Holy's last building
soon went down with a loud ka-boom.
Official Number One Suck of
the South-East Regionals Group 3: HolyAnarchy
Lessons Learned
- Octopus RULES!!
- Winning isn't everything.. its just better
than losing.
- If you ask William to br you he is likely to
try and make a fool of you.
Game Statistics
- # of mutalisks which died to irradiate:
millions
- # of lost peons: 17
- # of comments made by players or observers I
didn't understand but included anyway: 26
- # of times I set the clock back on my
computer to continue using my gif animator: 0..
that would be illegal..
Disclaimer
As in all of my battle reports I make
fun of the contestants and fellow observers. As
in all of my reports this is totally uncalled
for. All four of the players have gosu talents
which far surpass my own. Yes even Holy. Or if
you prefer the Sp|nE method, THE PREVIOUS REPORT
CONTAINED COMMENTS OF AN UNECCESSARILY MALICIOUS
AND UNFACTUAL NATURE.

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