"Valks shred through wraiths and mutalisks like they're made of aluminum foil (in fact, I think wraiths ARE made of aluminum foil)"
-Dev
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| Chaos in the Green Valleys | | | Author: | | | IP: | XXXX | | Date: | 06/09/99 01:06 | | Game Type: | Starcraft | | Labels: | Starcraft(1), Text Only(1) | | Report Rating: , # of Ratings: 3, Max: 8, Min: 7
Lifetime Rating for omgtktt: 8.5000 |   | Hi there… this is greyhoundbus moonlighting as Omgtktt. I use this name to play BGH games so sue me :p. Anyway while I was hanging out on nohunters a buncha of people lead by TheAntar decided to play a game so we went to a private channel for a 3v3. However, there were more than six of us, so me and -CD-idnew(hereforth referred to as Wendi) volunteered to observe. At first it was going to be a straight 3v3, but then someone came up with the not-so-straight(practically gay) idea of having a 'free-melee'. 'Whazzat' I wondered… and I was told it meant you make allies and break allies as you go along. If it sounds like this isn't going to be a very coherent battle report, then YOU ARE RIGHT! Hell, even Wendi and I knew we were in for a headache… But I guarantee you one thing. You won't see many 'strats', but if it's action and intrigue you want, it's all here!
The map: Green Valleys
Players :
Lusted Medic: Brown Zerg, starting at 2 o'clock
Asciiman: Purple Zerg, starting at 3 o'clock
Sqishkebab: Red Protoss, starting at 4 o'clock
Nestea: Teal Terran, starting at 6 o'clock
TheAntar: Blue Terran, starting at 8 o'clock
Disgruntled Ape: Orange Teran, starting at 10 o'clock
Who cares where they started, cut to the chase!:
No one seems willing to make any early move… so no one gets rushed. Two terran commanders, Antar and Ape, waste no time in allying their forces, and both start with offensive builds: m&ms and no bunkers. Antar starts a factory soon, though: it looks like he's going to provide the tanks.
The third Terran, Nestea, makes a basic bunker defense and floats a factory and a barracks up to the cliff that lead to Antar's base… it's obvious what he's thinking.
The devious cerebrate, Lusted Medic, wastes no time in getting two, then three hatcheries going. A second extractor springs up fast at his gimme expansion. Early on it is obvious that Mutalisks are on the agenda.
Asciiman proves to be a more easy-going cerebrate, and doesn't expand or build much for quite a while. When he finally expands, he starts building a force of hydralisks.
The lone Protoss Executor, SqishKebab(from here on referred to as Squick), quickly sets up a good defense at his gimme expansion, securing the cash he'll need to defend himself against other lesser races. A force of Dragoons , Zealots and High Templar already begin to gather there.
Then it happens: Nestea's small force consisting of 1 tank, 1 vulture, and 4 marines head for the cliff overlooking TheAntar's Command Center. Antar already has a lone tank situated at the hotspot overlooking his SCV line, but it's obvious that that alone isn't enough to stop Nestea's force. The initial fire from Antar's tank deters Nestea at first, whose troops retreat for a moment, but Antar knows he's not in a good position and quickly opens communications with Nestea to negotiate an alliance. Nestea, eager to preserve the brotherhood of man (and get an ally too!), promptly agrees. However, Ape and Antar do not reveal the mutual alliance they have to Nestea. Aren't humans lovable bastards?
Also, intercepted communications between the combatants reveal that Nestea has also allied with the Protoss Executor, Squick, so there will be no fighting between these neighbors for a while. Medic meanwhile has made a pact with his fellow Cerebrate, Asciiman, ensuring that the two, ALSO neighbors, will not butt heads soon.
After a short interval, Lusted Medic(who apparently found time for hydras in between mutas) drops a pair of happy-go-lucky lurkers at the cliff overlooking Squick's main, and after taking care of cannon threats, promptly has them attack Squick's assimilator. Squick's unamused templar and dragoon promptly drop off near the lurkers and dispose of them with a combination of psi-storm and photon fire. Don't say the Zerg lack a sense of humor!
No more confrontations occur for a long time, as each combatant takes time to expand to the gimmes and cliff expansions nearest to their mains. The only exception is Squick, who also expands at the empty 12 o'clock position: far, far north of his main at 4 o'clock. A risky move that will prove disastrous soon.
It doesn't take long for Antar and Ape to get wise to Squick's expansion efforts at the 12 o'clock position. Soon Antar has a huge force of tanks and goliaths gathered at the cliff overlooking Squick's expansion, but Antar cunningly orders his men to hold their fire until every last tank is sieged and in position (I'd call it 'allying with the chump'… comprende?). A couple of Squick's Dragoons spot a couple of Antar's tanks on the cliff (who must have fired against orders :) ), and move into position to take them on. However, when no further fire is met from the tanks, the goons look at each other quizically for a few moments… the truth only dawns on them when Antar undoes his VERY temporary alliance with Squick and the base is simultaneously bombarded by more than a dozen tanks. Within seconds the Nexus and it's surrounding buildings are reduced to rubble. Only in melee, folks.
Squick's forces are noticeably pissed, and several scarlet goons and zealots move to the center to take their rage out on anyone unlucky enough to past by. Meanwhile, Lusted Medic has gathered a sizable force of Guardians and Zerglings who start moving towards the middle. At first it looks like they are looking to start a fight…
But then the fight comes to Medic first. Somebody launches a nuke… until now no one but the nuker himself knows who. But in a strange twist of fate, both Squick and Antar, who had crossed swords just moments earlier, decide to launch an attack against Lusted Medic's Zerg Stronghold. Antar's force of Goliaths and Tanks, who had just merrily blasted Squick's 12 o'clock expansion to oblivion now takes the high route to the cliff overlooking Medic's main at 1 o'clock. Meanwhile, Squick's ground forces, apparently goaded by Medic's Zerglings at the center, move by the low route to Medic's main, taking out Medic's gimme expansion enroute. Medic's force of Mutas and Guardians are obviously no match for the combined onslaught, and he wisely retreats what few forces that haven't been killed to his more secretive cliff expansions.
During this gangbang, Nestea's marines and medics, feeling a little restless, run headlong into Asciiman's Zerg hideout. At first it seems like a close fight, but the unstimmed marines prove to be no match for Asciiman's upgraded hydras, even with medic support.
After this attack on his base, Asciiman feels ready to share the love, and has dozens of hydras fill the ventrical sacs of his Overlords. The flying abominations move south, and find a convenient target in Squick's poorly defended main. Squick's forces, probably weakened by the attack on Medic's base, are unable to withstand this merciless backdoor onslaught, and he is forced to watch as his main is reduced to ashes. This is getting to be a habit for poor Squick. Meanwhile, Medic is having his own problems, as Antar's forces begin sieging his main from the safety of the cliffs. It isn't long before the ground is covered with the blood and tattered flesh of Medic's buildings.
Ape finally shows his face(or was he the nuker earlier on???) by launching a nuke at one of Squick's last two cliff expansions, destroying all but a few quick-witted(or lucky) probes. Nestea, who had earlier allied with Squick, suddenly backstabs him by sending a small force of wraiths to attack this expansion. Squick's lone Dragoon, stunned by this betrayal, can only stand paralyzed by moral shock as the wraiths fire their puny lasers at him. Only a fellow templar has the presence of mind to psi-storm the wraiths, but even this is a useless gesture as more wraiths come in to finish the job. Medic's Guardians, meanwhile, having a hard time dealing with the recent loss of their comrades, release some grief on Squick's remaining expansion at the extreme bottom right. They make short work of it, and then foil Squick's attempt to build a CC with a mind-controlled SCV. Amid pleas by the Protoss Executor to allow him to remain and watch the remainder of the battle, his last building is destroyed, and poor Squick becomes little more than a memory.
Suddenly, Ape announces that he has to leave… his men have all just finished their tour of duty and are allowed to go home now. They promptly pack up and go (no doubt to some exotic beach resort), leaving just four combatants on the battlefield.
Asciiman's Hydralisks, meanwhile, having just savored victory at Squick's main, continue their proud march clockwise around the map, and run into Nestea's main. They quickly deal justice to the backstabbing Terran, leaving him with only one expansion on a cliff(which he shares with his ally Antar), which he proceeds to guard heavily against drops by turreting every square inch of the island.
Antar hasn't been sitting on his hands, and has gathered up a respectable force of wraiths as well as a couple of nukes. Eager to take out Medic for not showing mercy to Squick, He launches two nukes at Medic's last expansion and finishes it off with his wraiths, taking the uncompassionate Cerebrate out of the game.
It soon becomes apparent that Antar has shrewdly made a pact with the still-powerful Asciiman, but though he knows the location of Nestea's last Command Center, he decides to let Asciiman's forces take it on themselves. The overlords move in for a drop on the base…. Many of the foul creatures die to turret fire, but many more hydralisks succeed in dropping, and they promptly dispatch Nestea's few remaining marines before levelling the vulnerable base.
With only two remaining allies in the battlefield, the war ends. Both Antar and Asciiman's forces come together in interracial harmony and party like it's Nineteen Ninety Nine, with Zerglings giving Medics piggyback rides and Marines playing cards and chugging beer with the jolliest Hydras you ever saw. Now doesn't that make you feel good?
Lessons learned:
-Reporting on a 6-player free melee is a MAJOR HEADACHE!!!!!!! DON'T TRY IT!!!!!!!!
-Ally thy neighbour, and make sure he's really your ally. If not, backstab him before he backstabs you.
-If you want to siege an opponent from a cliff in melee, ally your target opponent temporarily and get every tank in place before unallying. Not only is this common sense, but it's cool to see 24 tanks go off at once :).
-Reporting on a 6-player free melee is a MAJOR HEADACHE!!!!!!! DON'T TRY IT!!!!!!!! Did I already say that?
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