Well guys, it was bound to happen. On August 27th, my little brother Jackie turned 8. One of his favorite pastimes has always been to sit Indian style on the floor next to my chair and watch me play the game of Starcraft. Sometimes during a lull in the action, I would turn to glance at his sparkling eyes as he watched my troops zigzag across my monitor.
"Jonny," he would say, "Can I play?"
"No," I would reply, "You're too young to be playing a game like this."
The disappointed look on his face always caused me a pang of guilt. I knew the real reason I wouldn't let him play was because I wanted to play. But time has passed since then, and now my interest in Starcraft has begun to wane. However, Jackie's interest in the game has continued to grow.
And so it was that 4 days after his birthday, he was sitting on my bed reading the Harry Potter book that he had gotten for his birthday while I clicked my mouse pointer furiously on my screen trying to lead my Zerg minions to victory. As my mutas attacked my opponents expansion, I heard a resounding snap as Jackie closed the book. I heard his barefeet move across the carpet behind me. Then, his shadow appeared on the floor at my side. I glanced down at him.
"You're finished with your book already?" I asked incredulously.
He smiled proudly, "Yup!"
"Good job buddy," I said and then returned to my game.
It wasn't long before my opponent had finished a resounding whomp of my sorry self sending me back to the chat room with a resounding boot in the butt. I glared at the screen for a couple of seconds as the chat scrolled up the screen. My Starcraft skills just weren't what they used to be. Someone messaged me but I ignored them and logged off Battle.Net. Then I started to rise from my chair. Jackie's voice broke into my thoughts.
"Jonny, can I play? I'm 8 now."
I looked down at him with affection. He was so mature for his age. Surely he could handle himself on Battle.Net with the same maturity that he handled his responsibilities around the house. He always made his bed in the morning and he never forgot to feed his pet hampster. I was proud of him, there could be no doubt. Someday he would grow up to be a good, responsible adult just like me.
I picked him up and he squealed with delight. I set him in my chair and he grabbed the mouse like an old pro and clicked into the game. I decided not to say anything, I wanted to see how much he had learned from watching me.
He created a new account with ease and to my amusement, he chose the name "Dreffie". I felt a swell of pride in my chest. He wanted to be just like me.
After creating his account he landed in Brood War USA-5. But he hadn't logged on to chat, he had logged on to play. He immediately clicked on the Join button. He scrolled down the list of games. He seemed to be looking for something. After 3 or 4 screen refreshes he found what he was looking for. The name of the game he double clicked on was "-AS- Clan RecRUit".
I was horrified. He was trying to get into a clan. Should I try to stop him? Should I teach him of the evilness of clans early before he became corrupted? I looked at the screen to see what he had gotten himself into. The map was BGH and 4 of the 8 slots were closed. Jackie was the third person to enter the room. The top two slots were occupied by -AS- members. Then, shortly after Jackie joined the game, a third -AS- member joined.
Now, a Battle.Net veteran would immediately know that the only outcome to a setup like this would be a bad one for the non- clan member, but Jackie was nonplussed by the circumstances. He immediately started trashtalking before any of the members had a chance to say a word and I couldn't believe some of the things he typed. This was his first game of Starcraft ever, yet he was trashtalking like a pro.

I began to wonder about my little brother. How much had he learned from watching me play Starcraft. Perhaps like Ender Wiggin of old, Jackie would immediately pick up the game and begin to show the land of Battle.Net how Starcraft was really supposed to be played. I began to smile to myself thinking of the fame I would receive being Jackie's older brother. Not even my celebrity status as a battlereporter would be able to top "Dreffie's" escapades. I could see it now. We could start our own Starcraft business. Dref & Dref enterprises, the two of us leading the world in all things Starcraft.
I shook myself and realized that I had been daydreaming. I returned my attention to the screen remembering that the odds against my little brother were stacked very high. I wondered how he would handle this situation. He landed in the middle left position as purple terran. For some reason I knew that he would perform a perfect clone maneuver on his SCVs sending each to its own mineral patch at the exact same moment.
That's why I was shocked when He took his mouse, selected one SCV, and sent it to its own mineral patch leaving the other 3 SCVs twiddling their thumbs at the door of the command center. Bitter disapointment filled me as I realized how idiotic the notion of my brother becoming the next Ender really was. But Jackie sensed none of this. He was perfectly confident that he was going to win the game and his interaction with the other players showed this.

Jackie brought his mineral count up to 106 minerals. Then he took the 1 SCV off mining and moved it up to the top left hand corner of his base where he began construction of a supply depot. It was a bizarre strategy to say the least, but at least the supply depot was in an out of the way place. The -AS- clan members probably wouldn't find it for a couple of minutes anyway. If nothing else, it could serve to prolong the inevitable.

Moments after Jackie uttered these words, there was a turning point in the game. This is probably the point where Jackie's chances of winning really went out the window. Six probes from one of the -AS- players arrived in Jackie's base. They immediately started to attack the three SCVs that were still sitting motionless at the Command Center entrance. Jackie did his best to fight off the merciless probe invaders but it was to no avail. The -AS- player showed his superior micro by killing all three SCVs without losing a single probe.
And now that the 3 SCVs were dead, Jackie's Command Center stood helpless, ripe for destruction. But instead of attacking the Command Center, the 6 probes made a beeline straight to the top right corner of Jackie's base where his 1 supply depot stood. Jackie's one remaing SCV was standing guard and he put up a valiant struggle to hold off the probes, but sheer number overwhelmed the SCV and he too was destroyed. I could see that Jackie was a little upset by this and he immediately typed an accusation at the -AS- member.

But the hack accusations were soon left by the wayside because survival had now become Jackie's primary concern. Six zerglings along with more protoss probes had arrived on the scene and they began tearing into Jackie's Command Center. He immediately began begging for mercy.

Jackie's command center began to burn and as it reached 23 hitpoints, Jackie lifted it off the ground. The three -AS- members were left to watch in awe as the gigantic command center hovered over them burning spectacularly. Jackie was left to plead to the only being that could save him now.

And then, with a loud explosion, the command center blew itself into oblivion. The -AS- members had their victory.

I glanced down at Jackie. He had a dejected look on his face as he stared at the screen.
"I think you're still too young for this game buddy," I said.
He shook his head avidly but I would have none of his stubborness.
"Come here kid," I said.
I grabbed him around the waist and threw him over my shoulder like a sack of potatoes. He squealed with delight as I carried him out of the room.
"Let's go feed your hamster, then I'll take you out for some ice cream," I said.
"All right!" came Jackie's enthusiastic but muffled agreement as I carried him down the hall.
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