Scorched Earth 2000: Strifeshadow Smackdown
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Author:	Who'sGotLag.IDO
IP:	usrns94.XXXX
Date:	08/21/04 06:08
Game Type:	Other
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Report Rating: 6.6, # of Ratings: 5, Max: 8, Min: 6 Lifetime Rating for Who'sGotLag.IDO:
Ok, hello and welcome to a quick and dirty report. The should load relatively quickly and so lets move on. This report will be on a game I have started playing recently, Scorched Earth 2000. I'll just use the manual's quick game summary, "Scorched Earth 2000 is an artillery driven combat game based on "the mother of all games", Scorched Earth, developed by Wendell Hicken in 1990."  This version of Scorched Earth however is a java-based multiplayer game available below.   A Deeper Game Overview Scorched Earth 2000 (SE2k) is an turn-based, artillery game much similar to Gunbound or Worms.  In SE2k there are a variety of vehicles available, but they are all identical except in appearance.  All players have equal opportunities to fire regardless of what weapon they use unlike Gunbound.  The weapon variety is available through the shop where single-use weapons and items can be purchased.  Weapons are fired on artillery trajectories and can be aimed by manipulating the angle and the power behind the shot. Tanks can deploy shields to protect themselves from damage because any damage reduces the maximum power of the tank.  The basic items and weapon types are here, many coming in small/medium/large variants.       The Players After a quick summoning from my Strifeshadow list, 6 players were available to play... eventually after several abortive attempts. SE2k's waiting room is not the most patient and boots games that don't start fast. Anyway not that its important: Players Side note TheLemur Flare, the game host for today's game Farrat Ferret, Flare's online significant other. Usually whenever you see one, the other isn't far away. Epoch I forgot his ingame name. Close enough probably. I forget if Epoch had played before, not that it matters. demonsoft Aka computer, Demonsoft, afkboy. From now one referred to as computer the comatose or something shorter.
AlexanderYosh	Yoshi, still trying to convince him to join Blizzard and steal lots of stationary. This was his first time playing I think.
zip_disk	Our loveable hero never to be mentioned again except in the first person.

Hehe, I actually threw away the pictures for Round 1 as soon it was done because it was generally long and not incredibly interesting. computer and I spent the beginning of the game lobbing Sand Bombs at each other, basically completely burying ourselves while the others actually tried to damage each other. In the meantime, Epoch was the first to die when a direct hit blasted his through his depleted shield and blew his tank to pieces. Yoshi followed soon after with computer and I trying to dig ourselves out with Flare piling on more Sand Bombs and Ferret digging us out just to spite him. Eventually Flare won after many boring rounds getting a cash bonus for kills which he could spend on shopping for more weapons.

During the very long round however, we lost 2 players to strange and mysterious circumstances. While the round was still playing out Epoch disappeared from the game.  A short while later we found out why, apparently Epoch hit the backspace button on his keyboard which equals to "back" on his browser and was kicked from the game.  computer left to eat when the round kept dragging on (I think he just went into a coma at the keyboard again.).

Both Yoshi and Ferret, intimidated by my yellow truck, started driving me further and further into the ground. In this emergency situation I attempted to bury one of attackers to give me some breathing room but the Sand Bomb impacted on the very tip of a ridge between Yoshi and me. I was not amused though everyone else was.

The next turn I dug my way out only to have Ferret drop a Napalm into the little hole I just made, burning me out and ending my poor existence for this round.

Yoshi and Ferret then traded some near-misses but the destruction of the nearby cliff caused Yoshi to slide down the mountain peak and lose his valuable high-ground position. From his old position on top of the peak he was very difficult to hit, but now he had slid into the middle of a crater that was just created. Ferret later dropped a Nuke followed by a Napalm ending the round.

Yoshi then quit around this point to go work on WoW or something at this point and wait for a pizza.

Round 3 started off with a very large bang as Ferret flush with his recent kill cash dropped a MIRV on top of Flare and myself. Flare responded to this outrage by dropping a Funky Bomb on me as well. My brand new sparkly white Heavy Shield quickly dropped to a cold and dirty gray while my pitiful ranging shot on Flare hit nowhere of interest.

Ferret and Flare then turned their focus on each other but that didn't mean I couldn't enjoy some of the stray Funky Bomb shells.

That small crater next to the yellow arrow (pointing at me) in the middle is the spot where my own Roller detonated after failing to clear the cliff edge over Flare and rolling back at me. I did however throw a few Rollers on the left side of the slope above Flare and laughed as they rolled down and exploded next to him.

Following a badly missed Napalm by Ferret, Flare dropped a Funky Nuke on top of him, hitting me with stray shells. Again. The explosion from the Funky Nuke created a large crater under Ferret causing him to fall down.  Ferret didn't have a parachute or they weren't enabled so he hit the bottom like a ton of bricks and exploded digging an even deeper hole.

Myself being close to the massive crater's edge of course fell in but I had a parachute and floated safely to the bottom.

Flare and I traded plain Missile strikes for several turns with me "cheating" by replacing my Shields when they died and using a Battery to restore damage to my truck. Flare also had the unfortunate disadvantage of being on legitimate ground while I sat on the bottom of the playing area. With my ground indestructible, I had a stable base to fire shots from while Flare constantly had to change his aim as the ground disintegrated beneath him forcing him to shoot higher and with more power to clear the cliff face.

Rather than give me kill cash or playing a really long round, Flare committed suicide ending the round.

As was typical for every round, Ferret and Flare started off by hitting each other with Napalm and Funky Bombs.  As you can see in the picture, Ferret said that while dumping flaming Napalm on Flare's red rump.

Ferret however was soon overcome by the power of the Funky Bombs/Nukes and was eliminated from the map. At this point Ferret left the game.

Due to the lack of kills, I was short of useful weapons and could hardly win the match against Flare's superior firepower.

Rather than continue the game with just 2 people, Flare hit the "Mass Kill" button and blew us both to pieces ending the match.

Notes

1. SE2k could use some pity cash for losers who don't get any kills. Basically the winners of the first rounds can get cash, buy lots more weapons and then win again the next round. Unless of course what happened to Flare happens.

2. The game waiting room for SE2k isn't that great either. Sometimes games take a little while to form and constantly booting everyone doesn't help.

3. Players named zip_disk should get invincible shields.