"But he lags like a government worker"
-VRAM1974
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| CHEATERS!! | | | Author: | | | IP: | XXXX | | Date: | 08/20/99 10:08 | | Game Type: | Starcraft | | Labels: | Starcraft(1) | | Report Rating: , # of Ratings: 1, Max: 2, Min: 2
Lifetime Rating for Alexis: 2.0000 |  | Me: 11:58 Position as the Terran
Opponent: I don't know where it is... and they are some kind of vegatable named "Protoss"
I heard of this great game called "Starcraft" so I decided to check it out. I played stuff like UO (Ultima) and since that was so successful, I decided to give this a shot too... since it was so popular as well.
I went right into this battle_net thing (I was always quick to learn) and figured out how to join a game right away. I had apperently chosen some 'NEWBIEEZ UNLY' map.
I had played a little bit before I came online, so I knew what alot of the different things I could do was. I was quick to learn that is. He uttered a "GL" before the game began. GL must be some kind of cheat initiation code. I said Gl back. Nothing happened... "GL GL GL GL" so he says "Um.... u2"
The game begins, and I find myself with a command center and four Model T-280 Space Contruction "Veehicals". Or SCV's if you want to be specific.
Knowing my initial plan, I immedietly run the four off to go see where my enemy is. It's always important to find out. I sent all four so that it was more likely one would make it back. I sit back and wait for the radar to show something up. Soon I hear "Your forces are under Attack" and I'm like WTF??? Space construction "Veehicals" are supposed to be extremely sturdy.
Well... something called a "Zeelut" was attacking the four of them, with a diamond ring thingy next to it. I came to the conclusion the Diamond thing was giving the "Zeelut" psychic powers by the way it looked, so I ran the four scv's next to it.
Then... to my dismay, the SCV's (Getting tired of typing the long name) started fizzing up the diamond! Geeze! I'd imagine anyone would want powers. Meanwhile, the "Zeelut", powered by the effects of the Crystal, started ripping up the SCV's. I decided to salvage what I had left, so I ran back to the base. I had 1 SCV left at this point. He (or she) MUST have been cheating. I told my scv's to glamour the power of the crystal and they attacked it! Hrmpph. I built one more with the 50... whoa! I have 50 minerals! Haha.. I must have stole it from the zeelut. I used it to build another SCV, and told the two of them to mine.
Then, I saw a message "You're a newbie aren't you?"
I had heard alot of newbies in my time. Many people are them, but most hide that fact. I told with Pride,
"Yep! I'm 100% Newbie Factor here! And if you don't respect that, I'll pound you down!"
"Hmm... I'll lay off you for a while anyway...."
"muahahahah..." I laughed to myself. I just bought myself some free time. Seeing he had 'Zeeluts' I decided to try to cave him in. I started building Missle turrets.. what?? Engineering bay required? Aww shucks...I'll build one. I didn't have enough money, so I built more scv's and mined. Wait? More supply depots needed? I'll just hatch an overlord.... wait... where's the overlord? I don't freaking have any!!!
I know I got hacked again. Then I noticed the 'Supply Depot' to build. Hmm... must be some alternate name. I build 10 of them every time I have 100 cash. After I had 34 scv's, I figured I'd have enough.
As soon as it's finished, I run up four or five scv's back to my opponent's base. Now begins my plan! I go wild and build dozens of missle turrets at his entrance. He won't be able to get out! hahahah!
As I build more, I see his 10 zeeluts come up, and he utters a "?". Even he is shocked to see this sight! Now, I... WTF?? The 10 zeeluts start ripping the turrets to pieces! FIRE TURRETS! FIRE!!
Well.. that was over quick. I sent my remaining SCV's up. I realized I needed gas, so I sent them over... oh wait. I need a refinery... Ok... I built one...there. We've got gas now.
I clicked on the command center to take a look, and I noticed a faded out building on the side. Komesat? I could use a Komesat. I build the needed Academy and got the Komesat. Ha! Now I am armed.
Checking out the comsat, I don't get what it is supposed to do. I Start entering in all kinds of stuff, then, on a whim, I type in "Hacks". WHOA!! It says 'Select Target!' Hah! I click on my Komesat and a blue swirl flies around my base. Hehe... must be like an easter egg or something, cause it sure didn't do anything.
Looking down, I see a few zeeluts coming up to take my base. Not today! I click on my scv's and tell them to burrow. Er... where is the burrow command? BURROW DANG YOU!!! Well, after 8 or 9 scv's have been taken down, he retreats the zeeluts. Hehe, I scared him off.
My opponent says "Get some marines and Firebats"
I realized I didn't have any of either, so I ask "Where do I get them at?"
"Um... your barracks..."
I build my barracks with minimal losses to my scv's in accidental attacks on each other in a fight to see who'd build the great Barracks.
Now I can build Marines! I sent down 8 of them to the enemy base. I was intercepted by a few Big looking creatures that looked like it didn't make the cut to Sesame Street. Except these are mean little monsters. They shoot little photon ball thingies at my marines! Well, they are no match. I have STIMPACK! I Stimpack all my marines 3 times just to make sure they are all buffed up..what??? All my marines died in one shot each! I saw a dragoon and it only did 10 damage. HACKED AGAIN!!
"Get some tanks and stuff to back up your Marines" says the voice.
Er... ok. Tank Shoppee coming up. With great anticipation, I also saw the Starport. And Armory. And Science Facility! Wowee!!!!
I build them all, but scarcely, my toxis fumes and crystalline ores are running out. I build a tank or two, then, looking at my added treasure, the machine shop, it says "Research Siege Mode (Tank Upgrade)"
Hah! Who needed Siege mode? Tanks alone are the most powerful units in the game I hear. I send two of them along with 8 more marines I built over to attack once again. I Select them all, and this time neglecting stimpack. When I get there, I am faced by a strange robotic little slug. I was moving SOO slow! Hah! That's what he gets for cheating, I hacked his little slug. I Put all my units together into a big group so they would move together fast.
Then all of a sudden, the slug pukes out this blue ball, and runs right into my pool of marines! Upon contact, all but two of my marines exploded, leaving only them to guard the tank. I sent them straight at the slug, only to be faced upon by the blue ball again.
I had had enough. I build some Science Vessels at my Starport. They are supposed to be the best flying units in the game ya know. Looking at their size, I bet the could do some nasty damage in a kamikaze attack. I build two more and fling them at the slug. ??? They fly right over it! I keep flying over into a base and they are killed by this little flying jets. Hmm... I run.
Well, I still had a science vessel left, so I build two more tanks and 12 more marines, and flew them over! Oh wait.. only the science will... that's right. Well, I ran the vessel behind their base, and recall all my units! Muahaha... oh wait. I don't have it. I have Defense Matrix though!
Defense Matrix'll nullify their defenses. I cast it twice on the two slugs still there, and bring in my whole attack force!
WAIT!! It's not dying!!! NOOOOOO
Hmm...I'm almost out of minerals. I grab some firebats and run them into the base. I'll sacrifice them! Then they'll explode and kill everything! Muahaha... awww.... :( (;)
Well, my final try. I get a ghost, and a nuke. Then, I build up my greatest fleet. Then, The nuke!!! I move my ghost into my nuke silo. It says select target.. must mean the nuke. I select the silo, and off goes the launch!
Ouch... that hurt...(picture) well... it's dinner time anyway.
| | Battle Shots! | 
STOP ATTACKING THE DIAMOND! GIVE ME POWER!
Mine my pretties... mine!! Mine!!
Trap them in!! Muahhahah.... awww.
FRICCKKKK!!!! Um... dinner time..
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