"i'm caucasianally challenged ok?"
-ProtectorOfAuir
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| Newb Wars!!! A 2v2 on BGH | | | Author: | | | IP: | spider-tXXXX | | Date: | 01/23/01 12:01 | | Game Type: | Starcraft | | Labels: | none | | Report Rating: , # of Ratings: 1, Max: 3, Min: 3
Lifetime Rating for ShaunX: 3.0000 |  | WARNING: This is a text-only BR. I suck with pictures and know my rating will be even lower if I use them. I've tried to use semi-good detail. I also forgot most of my HTML...including stylesheets, so I couldn't do black with white text :(
Okay, this is the first ShaunX Newb Wars!!! Battle Report. This 2v2 was on the obs version of BGH I created for the sole purpose for "gosu" newbs to pound on each other. I had a lot of fun making this report, as I was a very critical observer lol (they're newbs, I can bug them if I want to). Anyways onto the game!!!
For protection of the lamers, their names have been changed. The NEW names are:
Team Stupid Honkies
Stupid: Toss at top left
Honkie: Terr at middle left
and their opponents:
Team Hopeful Lamer
Glimmer of Hope: Zerg at bottom right
Lamer: Toss at top right
Okay now that we've introduced the teams. Let's get to the game. One quick thing, they think they are playing for medic porn, so they were probably trying their hardest :P
Both Toss players built one pylon followed by a forge. Eventually this was followed by pylons and 32984733498573 cannons around their base and choke. However, Stupid left a path for ground troops to go through. He followed with two more forges and a lot of Gateways, and a CyberCore. Lamer built Gateway-CyberCore-Stargate-Fleet Beacon-more Stargates. Finally, Honkie commanding the honkies, is obviously teching straight to BCs with the exception of 10 tanks behind two supply depots. Jesus Christ, hasn't anyone in this game seen this site???
Ahhh, Glimmer, it seems, has started pumping Hydras, Zerglings, AND Mutalisks out of multiple Hatcheries. Not only that, HE EXPANDED!!!!!!! Unfortunately, his partner would not be helping him for awhile, and wanted to wait for his partner to attack (Sucks for him, don't it?). He is up to Hive level, and thanks to having two bases, is upgrading air and ground at the same time.
Time for the troop count. It's 15 minutes into the game, too, so take that into consideration. Lamer is in last place with 2 Carriers, followed by Honkie with 1 BC building and 10 tanks. Stupid is massing Dragoons (explains path in cannon defense) and has 2-2-1 upgrades. Taking the cake is Glimmer of Hope, with about a dozen Hydralisks, 30 or so Zerglings, and 15 Mutas. His upgrades are 2-2 for all units and has started a Defiler Mound and Greater Spire.
Glimmer dignaled for his partner to attack a few minutes later with the now 6 Carriers he had. He himself now had hatched those 15 Mutas into Guardians and hatched 15 new mutas. Their target: Stupid.
Soon, a Defiler plagued all the front line cannons, and Guardian spit was lobbed onto them. Stupid tried to scare the flying crabs away with taunts, but that just pushed the menace further. Then the Carriers came from the south and went straight for the workers and Nexus. Stupid ran one of his stupid workers somehow into Honkie's base and built a Pylon there right before his base's demise. It was now a 2v1.
There was now a brief pause while Team Hopeful Lamer rallied outside Honkie's main. I would like to take this time to point out how well Glimmer would be doing if he was building constantly: He's building from 3 bases with 15 Hatcheries!!! All his upgrades are 3-3 now too! This guy's a good newb!
Honkie hasn't been idle though. He has two controls of 3-3 BC's out of 6 Starports, and now 20 1-1 Tanks behind his wallin. Once again, Defilers came up and plagued the frontlines, but missed the BCs. Half the Tanks were reduced to 1 HP when carriers came a knocking. Yamatos began to fire, but then Glimmer brought Guards and Devs up with his huge amount of Zerglings and Hydralisks. Honkie said a few accusations about hacking, me helping, and them consorting with his ally, then left the game. Stupid followed suit, seeing as he only had a Pylon...
The final scores ended up having Glimmer of Hope with over 6 times everyone else's score. His supply had to be maxed out and he did most of the killing. He was also the only player who expanded.
Well, I hope my first BR was okay enough to at least get a 5. I've tried to take the advice from other text-only reports, but probably missed some stuff. CONSTRUCTIVE Criticism (flames are not constructive) are appreciated.
This is ShaunX, getting the hell out of here, and eating dinner!
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